July 2005

Secret Keepers in the News

by John Prin
Addiction Counselor
Did you know that the BTK serial killer started as a Secret Keeper^SM? That's right, Dennis Rader of Wichita -- the self-proclaimed "Bind, Torture, Kill" murderer -- led a double life for three decades. In court he pled guilty to stalking and killing ten neighbors while hiding behind a mask of normalcy. His facade? He was married for 34 years with 2 kids, held a criminal justice degree, and served as a suburban code inspector and officer in his church -- all while stalking and terrorizing his sheltered community.*

Rader, 60, fits the fourth secret-keeping category on the Continuum of Secrets: Criminal Behavior.

Long ago he stepped over the line between ethical/moral standards and relational boundaries, the third category on the Continuum, by breaking the law (fourth category). He crossed the line into crime by consciously presenting himself falsely as an upstanding and upright citizen -- a first degree murderer wearing a city inspector's uniform. (For more about the Continuum of Secrets, see Stolen Hours, page 244.)

Dennis Rader's twisted, ironic story is another in a long list of privileged and high-functioning people who have lived dark secret lives -- as I myself once did (never category 4!) until I learned to conquer the same secret-keeping^SM syndrome. If I can help you, or someone you know with similar issues, please be in touch.

Email John Prin your thoughts.

You can also reach me at 952-941-1870 or read my books, Stolen Hours: Breaking Free From Secret Addictions. and the sequel, Secret Keeping: Overcoming Hidden Habits and Addictions.

* Mpls. Star Tribune, June 28, page A3 and USA Today, page 3A